Doris the Democrat

I was cleaning out the books at Doris' house and I found a few old books that I had to keep. One well-worn volume was "101 Common Mistakes of Etiquette." Published in 1939, it was filled with precise rules on when to wear elbow-length white gloves and when to remove those elbow-length white gloves.

"A lady never removes her gloves," the thin book states, "when shaking hands."

Tucked carefully within its few pages was a handwritten poem. At first I thought my friend Doris was the author, for the poem was written on notepaper in her own hand. But a quick search on the internet revealed that she was not the author. The author is listed at numerous sites as "Anonymous."

I post this poem here, for it was written during the time of Roosevelt's reign, and despite the many kindnesses that school-children's history books have shown this man, I believe he opened up the treasury to the public, something that had been resisted during The Panics (depressions) of 1873, and 1893 and 1908. I believe that history will show that FDR's horrific decision to open up the public treasury will - in time - be proven to be the start of America's decline from hegemony.

"A democracy...can only exist until the voters discover that they can vote themselves money from the public treasury." (Lord Alexander Tytler)

An aside: The WPA was "Work's Progress Administration." The NLB was the "National Labor Board." The AAA was the "Agricultural Adjustment Administration."

Rejected
FDR at the gates of Hell

A stranger stood at the Gates of hell
And the Devil himself answered the bell.
He looked him over from head to toe
And said: My friend, I'd like to know
What you have done in the line of sin
To entitle you to come within?

Then Franklin D, with his usual guile
Stepped forth with his toothy smile and said:

"When I took charge in '33
A nations faith was mine," said he
"I promised them this and I promised them that
And I calmed them down with a fireside chat.
I spent their money in fishing trips
And fished from the decks of their battleships.

I gave them jobs in the WPA
Then raised their taxes and took it away.
I raised their wages and closed their shops
I killed their pigs and buried their crops
I double-crossed both old and young
And still the folks my praises sung. I taxed it so high they couldn't drink.
I furnished 'em money with Government loans
When they missed a payment I took their homes.
When I wanted to punish the folks, you know
I'd put my wife on the radio.

I paid them to let their farms lie still
And imported foodstuffs from Brazil.
I curtailed crops when I felt real mean
And shipped in crops from the Argentine.

When they started to worry, stew and fret
I got them to chant the alphabet
With the AAA and the NLB
The WPA and the CCC.

With these many units I got their goats
And still I crammed it down their throats.
My workers worked with the speed of snails
While the taxpayers chewed their fingernails.

When the organization needed dough
I closed their plants with the CIO.
I ruined jobs, I ruined health
And I put the screws on the rich man's wealth.

And some who couldn't stand the gaff
Would call on me and how I'd laugh.
When they got too strong on certain things
I'd pack and head for "Ole Warm Springs."
I ruined their country, their homes and then
I placed the blame on "Nine Old Men."

Now Franklin talked both long and loud
And the devil stood and his head he bowed.
At last he said: "Lets make it clear
You'll have to move, you can't stay here
For once you mingle with this mob,
I'll have to find another job."

And to think that this was a favorite poem of Doris the Democrat. :) But then again, she's really old (born in the early 1920s), and how could someone who lived through that era be expected to really understand anything about it? ;)